Lazy mistress, part 2

She gets up at noon and her first thought is: have I got any mail? Well, she did get some mail, but my point is that she is so desperat for contact with the world, and still she locks herself inside all day and doesn't even turn on her mobile. How can she expect to be contacted when she does that sort of thing? I'm so tired of her complaining about not being able to go out because she has no one to be with, when she easily can pick up the phone and dial a number. When it comes to being social, my mistress is the laziest person I have ever encountered.
As for her homework, she had better get her butt moving. The assignment won't write itself. I feel like her mother right now. But if I had been her mother, I would have sat in front of the television at this moment, watching my favourite show.This family is not working as it should. They don't dine together, have any interactions with each other, except during the summer holidays, don't have any physical contact with each other or even talk about their worries. Is it any wonder that their children have turned out the way they are? The oldest is unable to express any emotions and dreads to touch anyone, while the youngest turns to "angry music" when she needs a blow out, or whatever you call it. The members of this family just float past each other seemingly without seeing one another. Which is fine with me, I don't like talkning to any of them anyway. The less time my mistress spends with her family, the less I need to see of them. But it is important to point out that they DO function as a family. How, I don't know.
It's almost time for my mistress to put om her red pants and hand out her cards to the brats. All hail traditions. You would think that I'm going to make the most out of these couple of weeks by spraying little brats with ketchup and mustard and other nasty things. But I don't work in the open. I plot and scheme and make someone else do the dirty work for me. Why am I revealing this? Because you can never tell whether the person torturing you is doing it of his own free will, or by my will.
And now, food. Even villains need to eat!