What the hell is she talking about?

One would think that I would have left by now, but somehow she still manages to lure me back. Or perhaps it is impossible for my mistress to get rid of me. No matter how deep she tries to bury me, sooner or later, I will surface. I what a time to surface! I had almost thought that my mistress had been serious about trying to get along with everyone around her. Once again her naïve mind has received a nasty shock. Not to worry mistress, Trisha is here, and she is going to get rid of this nasty problem...
While my mistress has been busy "studying" and socializing, I have had time to take a look at our list. Of course, my mistress never intended for us to actually go through with the list, but I feel it is time to persuade her. All she need is a push in the right direction. And some lawyers.
And so my plan has been put into motion. All we have to do now is sit back and watch the minion's world fall apart. I love it when everything goes according to plan. You really shouldn't give me too much time off, mistress, I can do some serious damage when you're not watching...